I’m fixing a hole where Clinton gets in.

 

 

Like Stephen Hawking, Bill Clinton was always very interested in bending the space-time continuum and holes.

 

 

Dear sports, there is a fun program called ‘The Hawking Paradox’ on TV. It’s about how Steve had a naff theory that black holes eventually disappear, I mean completely man! And take all the information with them, leaving no forwarding address.

I mean, light, time, space, history, energy, mass, potential and every cheese ball ever. Being a good sport and after thirty years, Hawky said he was wrong, and that there are actually multiple universes in which black holes exist and others where they don’t. So no information is ever lost after all. Thank Christ for that. Instead, the info is er, “smeared” as a kind of 2D image on the outer fabric of the vortex whirl. The previous theory by my feeble reckoning, would have meant if all past, present and therefore future information goes up the old flue of the meaningless and empty void, well, it’d mean we never existed and nothing ever happened. Kind of the same feeling one gets at an unfriendly party.

So everything that is sucked into a hole is still around, can be retrieved and reconstructed, even cigars and the smears too, eh. Sadly, knowing any of this has not made me 109 million dollars. Now Hawking had a respected friendship in B. Siskind whom he disagreed with, but they fought it out with formula, thinking, posits and serious science. And as far as I can tell, theory pushing between the two enormous eggheads was in flux and open to er, contention.

Nice, eh? And Hawking eventually admitted he was wrong…and er, so was Siskind! Now there’s a Zen counter move, for ya. See, even scientists have pride, emotions and other motives, just like regular dunces…

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