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When is the next stage to Carson City?

May 17, 2008 by Colonel Robert Neville  
Filed under News

 

 

 

Carson: “Hey!”

 

Horse: “Hay?”

 

 

 

 

Polyclitus, a great Greek writer of antiquity, or maybe Arthur Wilson, said something along the lines of “Proportion is not merely a matter of individual taste, but belongs to mathematical laws of harmony, that can only be broken at the expense of beauty”. Pretty neat, eh?

Carson Kressley: “Lions, and tigers, and bad taste, oh my!”

Now my Japanese wife lived in New York for quite awhile and loved it, and if we could, we’d burn down our apartment and leave for NY now, and if you saw the curtains, you’d know why. Where would I be without my wife? Somewhere better! Er, no, not really. I’d probably be mailing from a rented palm tree somewhere on Saint Kilda foreshore.

Too often, I’ve focused on the wrong things, like the wrong hairstyles, the wrong girls, the wrong people, the wrong places, the wrong pursuits and especially at the wrong time. At least I was consistent.

Tina: “Everyone needs a junk drawer.”

Carson Kressley: “Yeah, but a junk wall?”

Curiously, our son has the rock n’ roll hair I wanted when I was fifteen years old, when I imagined if I just had hair like David Cassidy, the Swiss Whizz of rock, then everything would have been really er, cool and happening! Er, no. That was never going to happen with my hair that when grown longer, looked like Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon, which seemed like a good idea the time. Sadly, at the time, circa 1975 to 1995, I rarely had a good idea.

Thom: “These are total Vegas outfits.”

Carson Kressley: “Do I look like Liberace threw up on me?”

Thom: “The jacket looks like the interior of an old Studebaker.”

It’s funny that we can so often have wistful hair-and other naff based dreams that get things so terribly wrong anyway. I didn’t know anything about Cassidy beyond he had great layers that seemed so controllable and carefree. While my hair reminded me more of the ad that asks accusingly, even inquisitorially “Is your hair dry, lifeless and hard to manage?” Well, is it, would be punk rocker?

It’s pretty naff now, to ever imagined I could’ve had a teenage hairum like Dave. Unlike me, Cassidy could get a close up look from under his happy, lightly swept-back fringe at the lovely and edible Susan Dey. One’s vision could blur when thinking about her. Aah, yes. Susan Deyyy…

What this all means, is that for a lot of my earlier life, I’ve not really had much idea of how to achieve any sophistication or taste in either styling or grooming or even what it meant…Continue Reading on Colonel Robert Neville Always Dresses for Dinner

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