Obama Poops Gold

I’ve been reading the news on Google and have come to the conclusion that Barack Obama must poop gold.  I mean, the articles fawn over Lord Barack Obama Most Merciful as the second coming of Christ.  Oh wait!  He is!

The Savior is only waiting to show his godly powers to his minions of socialism.  I’m convinced he will soon be raising the dead, rainbows will be flying out of his fingertips, and milk and honey will flow from his loins.  I can find no wrong in the press with His Messiah, Lord Bararck Obama Most Merciful.

Contrasts that with the evil demons, the Satans of politics–George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Sarah Palin, and anybody with an “R” next to their name.  They, on the other hand, are the epitome of evil willing to destroy the environment, kill the elderly, starve children, and urinate on liberals everywhere.  Evil so disgusting, according to the press, only One person can stop it.  You guessed it–Lord Barack Obama Most Mericiful.

The press has made it clear, Lord Barack Obama Most Mericiful will fulfill all our dreams and cast out the evil demons opposed to socialism and government run programs.  Yes, Lord Obama has graced us with his presence.  If he speaks we are to listen, if he walks we are to watch, if he farts we are to sing Hallelujah!

All praise to the Messiah. All praise to Allah. Holy, holy, holy.  Barack Obama is entering the toilet!